progress hurts sometimes

Not sure I even need to add anything to that title -- it applies in so many ways in life. Sometimes it doesn't even feel like there's any real improvement for a while but eventually even discipline can bring rewards.

Surgery went well. At least I got by with the arthroscopic surgery instead of the full-blown, open up your knee kind. So now I'm healing from the surgery and I'm still healing from the injury but I can walk without crutches and I've started physical therapy and so despite the continued pain and discomfort, there is definite progress.

Comments

marianne said…

i'm glad you can look forward to healing, and that the surgery went well...... happy holidays-

December 22, 2008 at 9:38 PM

the grand duke of hop canyon

. Two o’clock this morning I was awake and afraid to go out of my bedroom because of not knowing whether my dog, Duke, would still be breathing or not. Jimmy was sleeping on the couch in the living room to be near him, just in case. He’s been in and out of the dog hospital the past couple weeks while they tried to figure out what was going on with him and they decided on Monday that a cancerous tumor on his spleen was causing his declining health. Actually, he was in pretty serious condition when he went back to the vet’s office this past Saturday. I’ve been grieving since then and I guess I’m weary of the pain. The pain of grief is odd – it seems to rise to the surface and be multiplied by each loss that is experienced. I think partly because it is simply a reminder of other losses but also each loss has some regrets associated with it and each loss permanently removes a blessing and a joy of some kind from our lives that we must learn to do without. And then once you’ve experienced

Leona Mae Killoy. 3-25-1914 to 4-29-2009

. I feel so sad and relieved all at the same time but Gramma passed away this week on Wednesday. I didn't know it was possible to feel both emotions to this extent, all at the same time. What a fighter she was. CHF, diabetes, heart valve issues etc., and 95 years of age but man, such a fierce little thing. She actually had a fever of over 108 degrees before she finally gave it up the other day...it was crazy. Her nurse said he had never seen anything like it. She was always so fussy about her appearance and grooming she would've hated the way her hair looked that day. She was also very, very picky about her personal comfort. We were always fluffing pillows and changing her sleeping (beds, bedding, etc.) and resting (chairs, couches, recliners, etc.) accoutrements because it seemed her opinions about such things changed weekly. Her food preferences changed frequently also and she preferred a varied menu up until the last week or so. Except for a few standbys. If nothing else sou

Maybe I'm depressed or something

. I guess that's what it is. Maybe, hopefully, it's just a temporary condition because I'm just so tired of watching my gramma die slowly, ever so slowly -- a little bit more of her gone every day it seems. It's very sad. And it's wearing me out -- draining the life out of me -- more mentally than anything. Her hospice nurse said that she had declined around 30% during the month of March when he visited last Friday and I'm not handling this prolonged, protracted dying process very well. I wish I had taken the beautiful photo above but I found it here and I loved the comment that one person made, "A very nice shot. I congratulate you for this picture and it really touch my heart because the water drops on it can't make her alive anymore." I can actually feel the reality that this photo portrays. Consequently, I'm not very creative right now. I feel a little brain dead myself and like I want to hold at bay all feeling and emotions. Too painful

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